Key & Peele – East/West College Bowl
14
October

By Stevie Adams / in , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , /


– HI, EVERYBODY,
I’M DAVE STASSEN
ALONGSIDE GEOFF WORTHING,
AND WELCOME
TO THE ANNUAL EAST/WEST BOWL,
AS WE GET READY TO WATCH
SOME OF THE BEST COLLEGE PLAYERS
IN THE NATION
SHOWCASE THEIR SKILLS
IN A CLASSIC SHOWDOWN
BETWEEN EAST AND WEST.
AND THERE REALLY
ARE SOME CHARACTERS
ON THIS YEAR’S SQUADS,
AREN’T THERE, GEOFF?
– THAT’S RIGHT, DAVE.
IT DOES SEEM LIKE THE MOST
FLAMBOYANT PERSONALITIES
CAME TO THE FOREFRONT,
AND THEY ARE HERE.
LET’S MEET THE PLAYERS
FROM THE EAST. [rock music] ♪
– D’MARCUS WILLIUMS,
UNIVERSITY OF GEORGIA.
– T.J. JUCKSON,
WAYNE STATE UNIVERSITY.
– T’VARIUSNESS KING,
MERRIMACK COLLEGE.
– TYROIL SMOOCHIE-WALLACE,
UNIVERSITY OF MIAMI.
– D’SQUARIUS GREEN, JR.,
UNIVERSITY OF NOTRE DAME.
– IBRAHIM MOIZOOS,
UNIVERSITY OF TENNESSEE
AT CHATTANOOGA.
– JACKMERIUS TACKTHERITRIX,
MICHIGAN STATE UNIVERSITY.
– D’ISIAH T. BILLINGS-CLYDE,
COASTAL CAROLINA UNIVERSITY.
– [lisping]
D’JATHPER PROBINCRUX THE THIRD,
THOUTH CAROLINA THTATE
UNIVERTHITY.
– LEOZ MAXWELL JILLIUMZ,
EAST CAROLINA UNIVERSITY.
– JAVARIS JAMAR
JAVARISON-LAMAR,
UNIVERSITY
OF MIDDLE TENNESSEE.
– DAVOIN SHOWER-HANDEL,
UNIVERSITY
OF SOUTHERN MISSISSIPPI.
– HINGLE MCCRINGLEBERRY,
PENN STATE UNIVERSITY.
– L’CARPETRON DOOKMARRIOT,
FLORIDA ATLANTIC UNIVERSITY.
– J’DINKALAGE MORGOONE,
UNIVERSITY OF SOUTH FLORIDA.
– XMUS JAXON FLAXON-WAXON,
CALIFORNIA UNIVERSITY
OF PENNSYLVANIA.
– WE’RE GOING TO BE LOOKING
FOR BIG PLAYS
ALL GAME LONG
FROM TYROIL SMOOCHIE-WALLACE.
– AND LET’S NOT FORGET
THE TIGHT ENDS,
IBRAHIM MOIZOOS
AND HINGLE MCCRINGLEBERRY.
THEY’VE BOTH HAD
AMAZING SEASONS.
– THAT’S RIGHT, GEOFF.
NOW LET’S MEET THE PLAYERS
FROM THE WEST. [rock music] ♪
– SAGGITARIUTT JEFFERSPIN,
TEXAS A & M.
– D’GLESTER HARDUNKICHUD,
UNIVERSITY OF WISCONSIN.
– SWIRVITHAN L’GOODLING-SPLATT,
SASKATCHEWAN UNIVERSITY.
– QUATRO QUATRO,
SAN JOSE STATE UNIVERSITY.
– OZAMATAZ BUCKSHANK,
STANFORD UNIVERSITY.
– BEEZER TWELVE WASHINGBEARD,
JONES COLLEGE.
– SHAKIRAQUAN T.G.I.F. CARTER,
UNIVERSITY
OF NORTHERN ARIZONA.
– X-WING @ ALICIOUSNESS,
MISSOURI WESTERN
STATE UNIVERSITY.
– SEQUESTER GRUNDELPLITH, M.D.,
ADAMS STATE.
– SCOISH VELOCIRAPTOR MALOISH,
SOUTH DAKOTA
STATE UNIVERSITY.
– T.J. A.J. R.J.
BACKSLASHINFOURTH THE FIFTH,
ALBION COLLEGE.
– [squeals]
SAN DIEGO STATE UNIVERSITY.
– DONKEY TEETH,
BOISE STATE UNIVERSITY.
– TORQUE…
[jackhammer drilling]
LEWITH,
NEVADA STATE…
PENITENTIARY.
– THE PLAYER FORMERLY KNOWN
AS MOUSECOP,
UNIVERSITY OF MISSOURI,
COLUMBIA.
– DAN SMITH, BYU.


72 thoughts on “Key & Peele – East/West College Bowl

  1. Subscribe to the new Key & Peele YouTube channel for all the classics as well as new-to-YouTube sketches: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdN4aXTrHAtfgbVG9HjBmxQ?sub_confirmation=1

  2. I had a friend named “ Teeter Tottle Tautle “

    But I realized I was delusional

    Edit: an accomplice said to me that he/she had a friend called “ airplane noises “ and he/she wore noise-canceling headphones when they were going to meet.

  3. Dan Smith, Eeee Eeeeeee, and Donkey Teeth need to help the wretched pitiful Redskins who like Miami are losing across the board. 👍👍👍

    Truly a sad situation for those teams indeed.
    😥😥
    Not to mention how the EACH and EVERY empire / referee continuously CHEAT when they penalize every other team for half of what they allow the greedy ass Patriots get away with
    😠😠👎👎

  4. eeeee eeeeeeeee what an amazing season he had, also looking forward to more plays from donkey teeth, he has very high potential, much likely to be the mvp this season

  5. Wait can someone explain how Texas A&M is "West"… they're in the Southeastern Conference, and approximately 10 times closer to the Atlantic Ocean than the Pacific Ocean. I'm confused.

  6. I just showed my 9 & 10 year olds all three of these…we laughed our asses off…😂😂😂…thanks Key & Peele!!

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